“If I come to you for pity and sympathy, you must remind me that I don’t need it.”
She told me to stay, so I stayed. When she said I could go actually, I stayed anyway and stepped beyond my station instead. It wasn’t my right to deliver criticism, that was a radical decision (ah hah). But I s’pose if it induces some form of self-reflection, it might be worth my dishonour.
My own experience tells me it is not always the reminder that other beautiful things are still in our lives which ameliorates the pain of lacking something we desire. Sometimes it is the realization that we ourselves must be better in order to deserve what we want. Perhaps that was not gentle, or sweetly sensitive, I was always too rough around the edges to begin with. But it was honest. And what else can I give but plain honesty? I would cradle the world in my hands and call it heaven if I could, but I know my place. I was there, because I should be. And then I cease to exist again. I don’t challenge it, I only seek to do my duty.
That should be enough storytelling for now. Everyone has their own demons to fight. And I have other worlds to cross, if only to become better myself.
“And if I come to you for love and affection, you must remember that I don’t deserve it.”
These days it seems I am surviving purely on the energy of my metal playlists. The music awakens some latent aggression in me, and pushes me to keep moving, even when it gets hard to breathe (this is half a joke, pneumonia is a form of lung infection). I might wake up one day soon and realise that in my fatigue I’ve failed to notice a hundred different things and all the shatterpoints in the world have changed. But then some people can only keep moving. I s’pose it might be a form of weakness like that.
“No Dream Can Heal A Broken Heart” is the last song from Sonata Arctica that I can claim to have any liking for, and it really can’t compare to their earlier works. They’d steadily moved away from their power metal roots with every successive album since Reckoning Nights. Their declaration that Pariah’s Child will be a return to their old style, however, has given me some hope. I haven’t had a metal record that I really want to review for quite awhile now.
Softly Questioning 